"Ignorance is bliss"

Apologies for those following for my lack of posts. The beauty of our trip is that we have the freedom to be in the community and create our own program. This however leads to us finding so much to do to fill our time that I have become so drained and exhausted! Also some other events have made me feel slightly down this week...

SAD NEWS

On Thursday I experienced something new and extremely upsetting. I heard that Baby Wasswa was sick and tried to call Edith. Upon not being able to reach her, I went with the other two to the Village of Hope to see the kids and spend the evening there. We ended up staying a lot later than usual, just playing with the kids and chasing them around their houses. I arrived home to a lot of messages with the awful news that Wasswa had passed away. I was so shocked and called Edith to see if I could go there, I didn't know what else to do. We were both in tears and I couldn't really understand much apart form that they had left to take his body to the capital city.

I have been lucky enough to have not lost a close friend in my life since I've been old enough to understand properly. Therefore this really hit me hard. Wasswa had been ill last Autumn and I had asked everyone to pray for him. I thought I'd never get to hold his little body again but God healed him and I have had the privilege of spending time with him since I arrived in February. His cerebral palsy means he can't use his muscles and limbs properly and he is constantly struggling to breathe. I am almost glad that the evenings events prevented me from going to see him as I would have seen him in an awful state. I will never forget the times I spent with him, spinning him and lifting him to squeeze out his amazing smile, despite his pain.

As awful as it is knowing he is no longer with us, it would be selfish of me to wish he was still here as his quality of life was so low. Edith had given him a home and love and care which I am so grateful for, however he couldn't do anything himself and was in constant pain. Now he is with Jesus and is able to walk and talk.

"When we die, we leave this earthly body, we will have a new eternal body in heaven" - 2 Corinthinans 5

The last photo I have with Wasswa (left)

Wasswa and I in 2014

HONEST THOUGHTS..

I recently read a blog post from someone who did a mission trip and it was so inspiring. I could totally relate to it and so this post will not just be stories of the past fortnight.

Being on a trip like this can and has elicited some interesting responses. Will had a particularly harsh anonymous comment on his blog telling him what we are doing out here is not helping anyone but ourselves. We are fully aware that attacks like this will happen but it is still always a shame to read such things. "and everyone who lives a Godly life will be persecuted"  2 Timothy 3:12
However it can raise some questions such as "why are we here" "what is our purpose" and "would this place be any different if I had never come here."
Life as a "missionary" may seem fun and exciting in the photos (yes, I do take a lot but I also love photography!) , and yes, it really is enjoyable. I intend in my photos to show Uganda as a place of joy and beauty as many people see "Africa" as a place full of poor people who travel miles for water and are all starving. Although there is a lot of poverty, that is not the whole story. There is a sense of contentment and joy, a feel of community, love for God and other positive aspects of the country and I want to show that instead of just 'poverty'.
The photos and the blog posts don't always portray the hard times that happen. I don't want to pretend all is perfect on the 'mission field'.

Whilst talking with a friend here, we discussed the need in the local area and how she is approached daily by different people asking for help. The phrase "Ignorance is bliss" came up and it's so true. Once you are presented first hand with so much poverty and people asking for help, you can't turn a blind eye to it or switch to the next channel. It is real and it is happening, right on our doorstep.

The reality is that although everyone at home is praising our work out here, we can't and won't change Uganda, or end poverty. And that's the hardest part. Although I am loving being here, it is impossible to avoid seeing pain and suffering; we almost become immune to it. Walking down a road past houses made of mud when even in Uganda our home is beyond adequate for our needs. Visiting women in the slums who are raising 5+ children alone and cannot scrape their monthly rent which equates to less than the cost of the trousers I am wearing. Holding a disabled child who can't move their arms or legs, will never be able to talk or walk, and has been abandoned by her ashamed parents. Sitting and holding such children and them weeing on you or vomiting and still holding them because you want to love them despite the situation you are in. Spending 15 minutes trying to feed the child  who cannot swallow due to their illness some porridge or rice and persisting while the food just wont stay in their mouth. These difficulties become normal when living here and I forget how far this life is from home.

When I first came, I used to avoid picking up certain children, the ones who look particularly difficult. I wouldn't even post photos of them as I feel it would be insensitive, but some of them have such disfigured bodies. I would leave them for the staff to feed. But I realised that I am not here to do what I am comfortable with. I'm not here for the cute photos with the children that are easier to care for. I'm not here to help and then go home and tell people of the "great things we have done".

Yes, we are trying to help people in the best ways we can find but even the hardest of days are nothing compared to the hardships of the people here. It is not what "we" are doing, but how God is using us. This blog is not about what I can do, but what God is doing in Uganda and this community. I am learning things every day. Things about Uganda, about God and about myself. I am learning to be wise in my choices, to see things through God's eyes and not my own, to be humble, to find good in situations, to do things, not for anyone to see, but purely because it's the right thing to do. Pointing at God and not at myself. I may have been given opportunities to help those I have met here, but these people have changed my life more than they will ever know.

Feeding David at Home of Hope

Please keep Edith and the Home of Hope staff in your prayers as they continue work after the loss of baby Wasswa, and that they have peace of mind that he is in a much better place than the world we know.

"Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus" - 1 Thessalonians 5:16

Wee'd on... again

MONKEYS

After a FOUR HOUR long church service on sunday we took the afternoon off... My highlight of the day was getting SO close to the Vervet monkeys next to the river Nile. Most people know I love photography and I take way to many photos of everything so I was in my element being amongst so many wild monkeys. Here are some shots of the fascinating animals :)

SPECIAL MOMENTS

Last night was another one of those special moments. 

The young lady who lives opposite us has been quite unwell. We thought it would be nice to cook a meal for her and her family as well as the family who stay in the room next door. This is an old lady and her two grand children who don't have their parents to take care of them. SO we bought all of the ingredients from Jinja market and cooked a traditional Ugandan meal! - Rice, beans and chapatti (like a flat bread/pancake)
We took it round and all sat outside eating together and each had a soda. Someone said they felt like it was Christmas! One of the little girls, called Promise, saved her chapatti and I asked why she was carrying it while dancing and she said she was saving it for lunch time at school (maybe the only thing she will eat) They were so grateful and kept thanking us but again we were also blessed. Seeing their smiles and dancing with them and singing was just so special and as the sun set we lit some Dalit candles and sat under the stars together. It's these moments I will never forget.

Left: Serving the Ugandan meal to our neighbours
Right: Dancing under a sky of amazing stars (couldn't get a good photo of them)

A SAD EXPERIENCE

The lady who lives opposite us "Mamma Danny' is 22 and has a husband (Moses) and one baby (Danny). She had some stomach complications which she asked the church house group to pray for. We later learned from her that she thought she was pregnant but hadn't felt the baby for a long time. She was in so much pain. We visited her one evening and prayed for her and consequently Will and I decided to take her to hospital early one morning (the queues begin at 6.30am)  She was in there for 4 hours before having a scan. Sadly, it was bad news and Mamma Danny had lost a baby, quite a while ago. It was still inside her which was what was causing the pain. She was then treated and we took her back home. It has been a very tough, sad process for her and she is now recovering. It was great to see her so happy and laughing during our evening meal together. 
Spending 4 hours sat in the hospital waiting room was another new experience for us. We saw so many sick people waiting to be seen for hours. At one point a motorbike pulled up and a man jumped off it, running to the front of the queue with his toddler in his arms. The child had swallowed/drank something bad and wasn't conscious. Juliet who was with us saw that no doctors had arrived yet and told them the best place to go to be seen.
Sadly, an hour later the bike driver returned and came to tell us that the father of the child had not made it in time to the hospital and the child had passed away. We couldn't believe it, we had just seen that child. It was so sad to know that he had a whole life ahead of him and it was taken. The worst thing is knowing if this was at home the situation would have been so different and he would have been treated in time. We are so lucky to have ambulances that come out in emergencies and nearby hospitals. It made Will and I feel so helpless and we wished we were doctors to help all of these people! Please keep the father of that child in your prayers as he woke up that morning with no idea that he may lose his child so suddenly..

Hospital waiting room!

WALKING THE PLANK

We also revisited Sonrise children's home this week. We discovered this organisation through Will and I playing with a huge group of children at a pool one day and finding out they were all orphans from this place in Jinja. After taking the woman's details (Brenda) we have visited twice now. They have a great set up, each bedroom in the big building has around 6 beds (usually TRIPLE bunks) and a nanny who is responsible for that room. They all attend school and also have a homework/learning hour when they get home.
The first time we visited we were asked to bathe them. This resulted in each of us in a different bathroom surrounded by 8 little kids expecting to be bathed. Will's room turned into a lake which spilled out onto the corridor after the water fight the kids had instead of bathing...
The second visit was interesting too, the staff asked us to take the kids for a walk. I would say the kids too US for a walk. They lead the way as we had no idea where they go. We ended up crossing a "bridge" which was a plant about a foot wide which stretched across a river which was ten foot down below... Bearing in mind there were around 30 children aged between 4 and 7 and only us looking after them, it felt very surreal and would definitely break every health and safety law in England!
However we all had a great time and it was nice to spend time with these children as they don't have their own parents to love them.
I also helped them with their homework and then we coloured in pictures from en Elmo colouring book. I remembered how fun it was to pointlessly colour in pictures! While we were doing this, a little boy called Brandy was sat next to me and said "Aunty Rachael I love you". It was such a lovely moment and we sat colouring and chatting together, very special.

Walking the plank...

SELF-WORTH SESSION

On Wednesday we spent the morning at Youth Support Uganda with the women's tailoring group. These vulnerable women are sponsored to do a course with YSU where they learn business and tailoring skills to give them a way of generating their own income and produce some stability into their lives.
Most of these women come from very difficult backgrounds and many are single mothers. The age range is 16-24 so they are still young and many did not finish school.
We ran a session on self worth for these girls. I asked them to write 3 positive qualities about themselves (the writing exercises also help to develop their English skills - we will be doing some English lessons in the future). Then they passed around paper with their name on and wrote kind things about each other as in this culture, speaking good words over each other is not done enough (I reckon it's the same at home)
We read some interesting comments "She has a soft body" "she has a good nose" and I got told I was "small"... but the smiles we saw when the girls read over their received comments was brilliant.
After discovering what they thought about themselves, and what others thought of them, we then showed them some verses in the bible showing what God thinks about them.

Will explained the verses to them and then we moved on to making bracelets to remind ourselves that we are not an accident but knitted together in our mother's womb and are all special, made for a purpose. Sarah sat and taught them how to make the bracelets and we ended up dancing and they were all smiling!

SLUM HOME VISITS AND THE WEE

We went to Masese slum on Monday morning. There were 8 family homes that we visited. We gave 1kg of sugar and a bar of soap to each family who were extremely grateful, and then after they shared their stories we prayed for each of them. The stories of these women are heart breaking. And when I say women, most "families" are just the woman and her children. Men are rarely or never there and the women are left to care for the family.
One lady we met was a mother of 4 children. Her husband is an alcoholic and does not contribute financially or help at all with the family. None of the children attend school as she cannot afford to pay any school fees. She is struggling to even pay rent for the mud and wood house she is renting in the slum which costs 20,000 (£5) per month. To make money she makes brooms from wood she finds. She said this is difficult because when she is collecting wood she sometimes gets caught on private land and dogs are sent to chase her. This is particularly hard because she is also picking wood with her youngest child on her back so you can imagine the difficulty of the situation.

Another woman I met is Sarah. She Was abused my a man and fell pregnant. He disappeared and she had to find somewhere to stay. A friend who lives in the slum let her stay with her. When she finally gave birth, to her surprise, it was twins! Sarah is now living with her friend and her children, and her two twins. She has no way of earning money with the babies to take care of so she can't see a way of getting her own room in the slum. It's like a vicious cycle and it's awful to see such a loving and caring woman suffer and be helpless in the situation. We spent time rpaying with her and she said she became a Christian a few years ago after a local church did outreach which was comforting to know she has hope in Jesus. I sat holding her twins Michael and Lucy who are adorable. Well, they were until one wee'd all over me..

Danny also wee'd on me but he's just so cute when he's asleep..

Baby cries at sight of white trio

GRACE

This is Grace (left) Last year I went with the social worker to a slum to do some analysis on orphans in need. I met Grace here. She had nothing and no parents to take care of her. she was timid and looked sad. I fixed the zip on her old waistcoat and I remember her smiling. Being back this year I have been so excited, Grace was chosen to come and be part of the Village of Hope. She has a house, a bed, a mother figure and a lot of new brothers and sisters! SO happy to see her again and in her new life of stability and love!

TRIP TO THE CAPITAL

Last week, Sarah and I travelled to Kampala (capital city) on a mission to find a guitar as there wasn't any in Jinja. After a long tedious search we found the music shop, bought the (fake) yamaha guitar and travelled 3 hours back across to Jinja. Sarah was extremely excited about finally having a guitar again and couldn't wait to sit and play it. However unfortunately after tuning it she squeezed in about one and a half chords before the top E string snapped.
And no we didn't sensibly think to buy spare strings for the dodgy unreliable guitar we drove miles to find...

Left: Jeff with the new fan. There isn't a story behind it but I think he looks adorable in his bright orange cardigan.

Right: Us making chapattis - Like a flat bread / pancake. We made over 40 for all of the kids and staff at Home of Hope!

SWIMMING LESSONS AND FISH EYES FOR DINNER

One day at Home of Hope disability home, we met a girl called Amina. She is deaf. She took us to a wall where the alphabet was painted and taught us the sign language alphabet which was really interesting and good to learn.
Amina is beautiful and always giggling. I asked her to come along to the pool with us that weekend as we were taking some other people there for a break (Edith from Home of Hope and Juliet and Sam who run the guesthouse.
She had never swam or been in a pool in her life. It was so interesting to watch how she reacted as I held her hands and guided her through the water. By the end she went down the slide and splashed around enjoying using my waterproof iphone camera.
Juliet also has never swam and it was hilarious watching Will teach her what to do. Less humorous when she dragged me down with her, drowning me...
We all enjoyed a meal together afterwards, the Ugandans all ordered Tilapia, a huge fish which looks as if it's just been caught, scales, eyes and everything (eyes are apparently the tastiest bit according to Edith). And they loved it, eating every tiny bit right down to the bone. We settled for burgers ;)

Left: Edith, Juliet and I - two extremely hard working women who we took out for a day off
Right: Amina, Sarah and I. Amina is part of Home of Hope because she is deaf. This was her first time swimming!

EMOTIONAL

During the dark journey home in the car, we drove past Kampala University, Jinja campus. From past experience I know and have visited the slum which is right behind this University building.
Sitting in the car picturing and thinking about those people, especially children, struggling with limited light, usually no bed, small mud homes, hungry and thirsty for clean water, and knowing it was happening right there and then, brought tears to my eyes. The worst part about being in Uganda for me is seeing so much desperate need and knowing that I can't change everything, so many lives, and end the suffering and poverty. It is hard but I suppose if we can help even just a few people to feel loved then our time here is well spent.

I also got emotional at Home of Hope disability home this week. I was sat on the floor with the kids all around me. I love each of them so much, their individual personalities are amazing and I no longer see their disabilities but just their joy and smiles. I was playing music through the big speakers which I got using your donation money from last year. They actually use this every day and the children LOVE it. They all dance in their own way with the limbs they are able to use. It brought me to tears just looking around at these children who I love, seeing them so happy despite not being able to walk/talk or move like we can. I feel like they are all my family and I feel so privileged to be able to help care for, feed, change and spend more time with them!


For anyone who has me on Facebook, towards the end of last year I posted a prayer request for a little boy at Home of Hope, Waswa. He has hydrocephalus (build up of fluid on the brain so enlarges head) and cerebral palsy. He got so sick and was admitted into hospital and I was told it was likely he would not last more than a week. This broke my heart as I thought I would never see him again. The thought of him suffering was horrible. He is already constantly straining, always has his arm and leg muscles tensed and finds it hard to breathe and thats on a daily basis without him being 'sick'.
The response from everyone was great and so many people prayed for him. I am sooo happy to say that I have been able to hold Waswa again and he is so much better. Thank you for all your prayers and thank you God for keeping him safe!

Above: Waswa out of hospital!

For those who haven't read my posts from my previous trip, I talked about how disability is viewed in Uganda. People with disabilities are seen as the very lowest in society. They are believed to be cursed or bewitched. If a woman has a disabled child she is actually encouraged to pray for the child to die. It's heartbreaking hearing how the children are found before they are brought to Home of Hope. Some tied up in a yard and left. Some babies are dumped in the road and left by the parents. Some found eating rubbish from the street or worse... And some girls in particular are even used to make money by guardians who send men in to abuse them. After talking to quite a lot of Ugandans, I've learned that dumping or giving away babies is a lot more common here than back home. Poverty can lead to difficult or impossible situations and desperate choices, it's just so sad that a child's life can begin with separation from it's parent. It's awful that these children are already suffering with being less able than other people but are then cast out of society, leaving them with such small hope for life.

HARD LIFE AND REAL HARD LIFE 

I heard a story this week that really puts things into perspective. My friend Luke who lives out here told me he knows a man who works for the Barclays bank in town. He is a security guard so stands outside with a gun all day at the entrance. He works from 6am to 6pm every single day. Not only does this mean he is working almost al of the daylight hours, but he also rarely sees his wife and children. In fact he sees them every 5 months. I just find this heart breaking that he is working so hard purely to fund his family and pay the school fees. It's awful to think that we complain about our day to day lives and work. Our jobs generally allow us to have a life around them so that we are able to think that each shift is worth it because life outside work is still there and we can fund it. It makes me realise how privileged we are to be in such a comfortable lifestyle and maybe that I should think twice before moaning about insignificant problems!

UGANDA

We are hoping to go on safari towards the end of our trip. I feel so privileged that we are able to do that and see some amazing African animals. I am absolutely loving being in Uganda. God has really put it on my heart; the people, the atmosphere, and just how beautiful the country is. I look around and see so much colour: red soil, blue sky, green bush, palm trees, so much wildlife, and in the sky there are always huge birds of prey soaring above me. I love seeing more of God's creation and being able to take in how amazing different parts of the world are. Oops I could rave about Uganda all day...

SUNDAY

Sunday was really special. We have several boda (motorbike) drivers that we use regularly and call then when needed. Will's driver Charles invited us for Sunday lunch at his home. We had no idea what to expect. No idea what his house would be like, or what we would eat... We worried that we would be given unboiled water to drink or a meal that our Mzungu (white person) stomachs couldn't tolerate.

Anyway, we arrived with our gift of a bag of sugar (this is seen as a good gift here - I think in future at home, we will turn up with bags of sugar to dinner parties...) and greeted the family. Charles has a wife, Justine, and three children, Jehoram, 15, Gemima, 10, and Joash, 1. After they showed us exactly which verse in the bible each name came from, we sat and made ourselves comfortable.
The minute baby Joash was carried into the room, he took one look at the three white grown ups staring at him and waving and burst into tears. He clearly likes us.

Left: Happy looking Joash... at least he wasn't crying anymore because I was a scary white person...

Right: The main room of the family home where we are and sang around the keyboard!

A massive answer to prayer, dinner was self service and so we could determine our portion sizes (Ugandans PILE on mountains of food onto guests plates usually). It was also SO lovely, Justine had really thought about what to cook. There was rice, potato, G nuts, Eggplant, cabbage, carrot, pork, pineapple and banana. We decided maybe one of the nicest meals we have eaten here! Plus they had even bought bottled water for us to drink. This all may sound quite normal and what you would expect, but bare in mind this is a family that collectively earn around £6 per day, have to pay rent and their children's school fees. They felt it a real honour for them to have us visit their home but for us it was an honour to be invited in and see where they live. It is basically one lounge room and one bedroom for the whole family, but they had made it so homely and warm.

After eating the amazing meal, we sat and talked about life and learned more about each other which was so interesting. Then Charles brought out the church keyboard which he looks after.
It was such a special time. We sat and all sang worship songs together for two hours, in English, Luganda, and Swahili, learning new songs as well as singing old (Lord I lift your name on high). It is beautiful to see how music can bring people together, removing conversation language barriers and enabling a time of fellowship. So lovely!

Above: Charles' family and us

We also prayed for them before we left. The family really touched our hearts. So many men here in Uganda leave the woman to do literally everything. They work all day and expect the woman to look after the kids even when they are home. In many (not all) cases couples are together for the convenience. Seeing Charles with his family was beautiful. He takes every Sunday off to spend time with his family. He helps to look after the children and shows affection to them and his wife. It was so lovely to see the family so united and there was such a loving atmosphere. It was obvious that they all love Jesus too, especially during singing.
It made me realise this is what this trip is about. Building relationships. Slotting into the community and learning what life is like here. Learning about the culture. Getting to know the people.



Thank you as usual for your huge support and prayers, we are praying for you too! It's been great to spend each morning together as a three doing daily devotions and praying for people at home, as well as asking God to continually show us what He wants us to do with each day. Sorry there is so much to read! Here's a sign which made me smile in Kampala. X